experiment 39 : 25.

what’s in a name : p2.
so check it.
i used to work with this kid at the writing center at city who LOVED to talk theory.  and he seemed to relish the fact that few of us knew what the fuck he was talking about.  of which i was not one.  all it seemed to me was a bunch of inaccessible bullshit issued forth by academics who like to hear themselves talk.*
at city an english professor spent an entire class session explaining what structuralism is.  by the end of the class i was convinced i’d have to change my major, so certain was i that there was no fucking way i’d ever be able to understand shit like that.
and granted.  i still find a lot of it to be incomprehensible.  but i’ve had good guides.  and what i’ve learned to do, and what i find exciting about theory is finding what you connect to.  much the same way as you would any other book.
a quote from what i read today:
“it is good to be dirty and bearded, to have long hair, to look like a girl when one is a boy (and vice versa); one must put ‘in play,’ show up, transform, and reverse the systems which quietly order us about.”    — michel foucault.
there’s a lot in there that i love.  the rebellious nature within it, of course.  but i love also that foucault plays with gender.  rebelling against social norms to you know, be free.  so down.  i definitely still femme it up when i feel like it.  but i’m most comfortable in androgyny.  i love embracing both sides of myself and wear them every day.  
pan reflects that.  
i’m chill, tho, you know.  i mean, i would encourage you, you know.  if you know me or whatever, maybe to try once or twice.  see how it feels.  
but i’m not gonna, you know, flip out if you decide to stick with chikn.
    

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